THINGS!

So the time is almost here to say goodbye to Catterick and hello to Colchester to join 16 Medical Regiment. Over the past three years i have gone through a number of ups and downs which i've shared on my blog. Now i am ready to say goodbye to it all, like the good old fresh start that everyone keeps talking about. I think i have started my fresh start already but there is something cleansing about packing everything and cleaning out my room. I've thrown so much away but still i have 8 large military boxes and a car full of 'things' plus even more at my mums. As i am packing and seeing my life in these boxes, it doesn't make me sad that this is all i have. It makes me embarrassed that i have so much! I will admit to being a hoarder and also a compulsive spender when i am stressed. Its not good and i am working through it, i got myself into a lot of debt when i went through my separation buying 'things' to fill a hole. Its ridiculous really, we work hard and put our lives and relationships at risks for what ? To buy a new dress, car or even house? Think of all the arguments or unhappy times you've had because you couldn't get something you really wanted or how you persuaded yourself that if you had this one thing you would be happy ? You don't have to look far to realize the media has a huge part to play, advertising shiny new things with the added extra of a beautiful human, who is so happy and content. yes i want that, i want to be happy, if i only buy that i will be a better version of me ! Yea it sound ridiculous really, if you have an object which you hope is going to complete you, then you may have a problem. Trust me i know! it has taken me to live off my money I've found under the seat of my car to realize ! At first i felt hard done by then i saw it as a challenge. I can't pray for wealth when i'm throwing it away like i don't want it. In the law of attraction it states you attract what you think, so if you think about money coming into your life, it will come. I don't think its that easy but i do think by making it the center of your thoughts for the right reasons, you will adapt your habits and actions which will therefore produce a positive outcome. I found the reason i wanted to save money and that is to travel and complete training courses abroad, this was my drive. Why ? I wanted to immerse myself in the culture of India to gain as much knowledge and insight to become the best yoga teacher that I could be. What comes with yoga is far more than headstands, crazy poses and tight pants. Its a lifestyle, of simplicity, love and trust. The teachings lead you along a path by which you can see the world as it is, to be mindful and not accept things at face value. Therefore how could i keep accumulating these 'things' when all my heart desired was inner peace and a more spiritual journey. I wanted to step away from how society tries to mold us to make us spend all our hard earnings to make the rich richer. I wanted to experience life and nature and feel free from unnecessary attachments. I don't need to eat out at fancy restaurants or stay in 5* hotels, i want to experience love and life stripped back. So it's up to you to see the negatives as a lesson to which you can grow or feel sorry for yourself and stay in the same routine. Figure out what you love and go get it! accept it may not be easy but that's part of the fun.